Glittering Bird of Prey

You hover

above everything:

a self-described mythical creature,

glittering hot pink, extended claws and 

sharp, wet teeth, ready for the next unsuspecting human to trip into your clutches, bedazzled

by the outward show you painstakingly cultivate, with greasepaint, costumes, posturing, claiming to be the best at everything, always.

Gnarled from so much pain in your past, it eviscerates your present,

while innocent bystanders (the ones not desired for consumption) are tossed down your dark hole that some call a soul.

You have grown numb to everything but your own desires,

singular, fixated, adorned,

touting others “un-evolved” as you pillage indiscriminately,

swooping in tighter and tighter circles, cawing:

“Look at me! Look at me! Look at me!”

But not too closely.

Because that’s when things become distorted, ugly;

Nature is harsh. It’s kill or be killed,

every woman for herself.

Free and glittering birds of prey can’t afford empathy...it cramps their style.

“Fuck them!” you caw. “Fuck you!”

“Fuck me...fuck me...fuck me...

I will give you everything,

until I have bitten and licked and sucked your carcass dry.

I am a glittering, hot-pink, mythical 

creature. 

Human bonds are irrelevant to me, unless they are serving my needs, filling a cavernous hole

that is never filled –

I am a bottomless pit that I circle 

around myself, outside of myself, 

but the echoes leave me haunted and wrecked,

starving,

empty.”

Your talons clutch at the broken branches you land on,

your eyes dart and follow,

here comes another one — sucker!

Bat your eyelashes, rehearse your speech,

and do what you do best:

placating the void inside you for one more day, stirring up Drama

with one more piece of meat.

You advocate for freedom above all else,

but you will collect the bones

alone.

Overlord L'Orange: Observations of an Average Citizen, Installment #105

Fires are raging all over California and the Overlord says it’s our fault, because we don’t trim our trees. Even though these fires are not in the forest, but are residential. He says he will withhold funding to help us, because he loves to blame the victim more than anything else in the world. He hates California because the entire state despises him, except for the white supremacists, who won’t admit that they are white supremacists.

L’Orange flew to Paris over the weekend to “honor” the soldiers who fought in World War I, but he didn’t make it to the actual ceremony because it was raining, and he would probably melt in the rain like the Wicked Witch. His hair must be a hot mess when it’s wet.

There is a photo of him and other world leaders gathered in France, standing next to each other as Putin approaches them. Everyone else is looking at Putin skeptically, as they should, but Overlord L’Orange is grinning like a possum to see his lover approaching. His wife is dutifully at his side, probably relieved that his attention is placed on his new love interest rather than on her.

The shooting at Borderline in Thousand Oaks only happened four days ago, but it has been swallowed up by the fires and the Overlord’s insults.

I would post more, but it is too depressing, gas-lit at every turn.

Overlord L'Orange: Observations of an Average Citizen, Installment #104

Another exciting day in the kingdom of Overlord L’Orange!

Where to start?!

Overlord L’Orange called the media the “enemy of the people”. Which is really ironic coming from him.

Jim Acosta from CNN reports: “…Overlord L’Orange’s Press Secretary was repeatedly given a chance to say the press is not the enemy and she wouldn’t do it. Shameful.”

The Overlord’s Press Secretary is broadcasted on the interwebs stammering and stuttering, saying anything but what she is being asked about. Diverting. Digressing. Dumbing down. She likes to wear pearls, because it makes her appear “respectable” while she spews her lies and bile; that’s a little psychological trick. She’s also a woman, which is purposely intended to make the medicine go down smoother, like sweet, warm Southern molasses. She’s also a mom; a mom would never steer you wrong, would she? She’d want what is best for you…you would trust her. She seems tortured to me, like her soul is fighting for a way towards the surface, but some dark, heavy force is squashing it back down, similar to Linda Blair’s character in the Exorcist. She grimaces and contorts her face, but she is an immovable brick wall. She’s got that sh*t pushed down *deep*. But it’s got to come out eventually, that is if she’s an actual human being. She seems like an animatron to me, like those awkward robots at Disneyland…a distant memory. That’s something one of my relatives would have joked to me about a long time ago, making fun of the “talking political heads”, before he was swallowed up by the GOP brainwashing machine, and sucked into the stratosphere a million miles away from me. But that’s another story, for another day.

Jim Acosta was also at the Overlord’s “rally” (a place for the Overlord to publicly stroke himself) in Florida earlier this week, where he was harassed by L’Orange supporters, who are a whack-a-doodle bunch!

Also, the Overlord proclaimed at his rally that the whole Russian thing is a “hoax”. The next day his White House team tried to clean up his mess, but this sh*t stinks to high Heaven! It stinks like a giant dump-truck load of diarrhea, composed of rotting hamburgers, mistresses, and Russian Oligarchs. And molted Ostrich jackets. The stench of it makes you want to vomit.

Additionally, and consistently, our planet is dying, faster than previously realized. But the Overlord wants to ease the rules on fossil fuel emissions for all vehicles in the United States. He wants to kill all of us, obviously. He wants his precious money, which means more to him than anything else in this God-forsaken country.

Lastly, the National Rifle Association is going bankrupt, due to all the angry, protesting youth. Those crazy kids! Still young enough to hope for a better future.

There’s so much more, but it’s hard to keep up with all of it, as you might imagine.

Overlord L'Orange: Observations of an Average Citizen, Installment #103

Today, Overlord L’Orange had another Tweetstorm meltdown, tweeting: “This is a terrible situation” (it is!) and the Attorney General “should stop this Rigged Witch Hunt right now, before it continues to stain our country any further”.

Firstly, why, oh why does the Overlord continue to communicate via “Tweets”?! It’s so undignified for an Authoritarian leader such as himself to communicate in this manner. Has he no self-respect?

Secondly, if he is innocent, why is he so fixated on stopping this investigation? That’s the main question. If he was innocent, wouldn’t he just be relaxing on his golf course in Palm Beach right now, Arnold Palmer in one hand and a Playboy model on the other?

Thirdly, I may be just an average citizen, but I happen to know quite a few witches, and believe me, they are not happy about him calling this investigation a “Witch Hunt”. Not happy about that at all. He’s not a witch; he’s a fake Christian. So he should really be calling this investigation a “fake Christian hunt”. In addition to offending women, people of color, and the LGBTQ community, he has now also offended the witches. Not smart. Dumb. And sad.

Anywhooo…this trial seems to be really stressing him out.

Also, he keeps saying that “Collusion is not a crime”, but lawyers from Ivy League colleges on NPR keep saying that collusion is just another word for “conspiracy”, which is a crime. They are two ways of saying the same thing. So I think the Overlord needs a new synonym dictionary. I’m sure he could find a good definition of the two words on the internet, but I guess he’s mostly just on Twitter. He might be happier with a hardcover gold-plated Thesaurus…that seems more his style. Although I doubt he would ever open it; he doesn’t seem much interested in reading. Although he might have much more time for reading soon.

Overlord L'Orange: Observations of an Average Citizen, Installment #102

It’s been raging hot in California…up to 111 degrees and beyond in the San Fernando Valley. The Overlord says that global warming is a hoax. The scientists on NPR say that we are all going to Hell in a hand-basket, sooner than previously suspected. Nine fires, or more (I’ve lost count) are burning right now. One (or more) of my religious relatives might call this the End of Times. Is the Overlord the Anti-Christ? Everything’s burning to a fever pitch. So hot. No relief in sight. Climate change is a hoax. “Just remember: what you’re seeing and what you’re reading is not what’s happening.” It’s a daily, massive mind-f*ck on a grand scale; some have succumbed to it, some have gotten fiercely angry, some have stayed in bed with the covers pulled up over their heads, sobbing, and some have become too emotionally exhausted and numb to do anything but post political memes on social media and fool themselves into thinking they are making any kind of difference.

But today’s good news is that it’s the first day of the trial of the Overlord’s political campaign manager, who is being tried on eighteen counts of bank fraud and tax fraud, and is also being investigated regarding his financial interactions with Russia. The FBI is looking for ties between the Russian government and the L’Orange political campaign. The Overlord’s lawyer, who always seems to not only put his foot in his mouth, but to actually eat it and swallow it again and again on National television said yesterday that “Colluding with Russians is not a crime.”

The Overlord had another hissy fit this morning, tweet-storming all over the place, saying that “collusion is not a crime”. Additionally, “there was no collusion”. But if there was collusion, it would not be a crime. No collusion. No crime. But literally, just a few days ago the Overlord said not to believe what I see or read…did he mean everything? Or just certain, select things? I want to be a good citizen, but it is so hard to figure out! It might be easier if the government placed some kind of chip in our foreheads, like they do with pets, so they could just feed us what they wanted us to know directly, without any of these fancy word phrases to confuse us!

The Overlord seems a little more uncomfortable to me now, more specifically today than any other previous day. He seems like he’s looking for a place to hide, but there is none. He’s also really angry at reporters lately, for asking him questions – those pesky reporters, with all their endless questions! He dreams of a time before all of this, when the whole world was made of gold and he was the King of that world. He curls up in the fetal position now in a separate bed from wife number three who he’s cheated on, and attempts sleep. It is elusive.