Overlord L’Orange: Observations of an Average Citizen, Installment #109; “Alabama”

     

     Overlord L’Orange has been placing ultra-conservative judges in the Supreme Court and various other judges in various other courts in order to further the Republican party’s attempt at controlling the masses of out-of-control women and people of color.

     These old white geezers like to stick together. It makes them feel safe, in an out-of-control world. Everyone knows it’s a ‘Man’s World’, and men need to rein in their fillies!

     Yesterday a female governor (ironically, and by no means accidentally chosen for this task because of her femaleness) in Alabama decreed that all abortions will be illegal, even in the case of rape and incest. 

     Why do the Republicans hate women so much?! My theory is that it’s because they’re terrified of them. They sense women’s inherent power, and feel the need to squelch it, to make themselves feel bigger and better.

     It’s interesting that at this point in time, when women have more power than they’ve ever had before, ‘The Man’ wants to take women’s right to control their own bodies away. ‘In the name of God.’ Bullsh*t! In the name of servitude to ‘The man’.

     As more and more children are going to be born now, with inbred defects and serial-killer tendencies inherited from their rapist ‘fathers’, the Overlord has decided to set up special internment camps to raise them.

     Since women are apparently naturally cut out to be breeders and raisers-of-children, the Overlord has appointed his own daughter, Ivanka, his female Press Secretary Sarah, his female ‘Counselor’, Kellyanne, and his wife/beard, Melania to co-run these internment camps for all the children whose mothers were forced to bear them against their own will, because if they didn’t they would be jailed or executed. These internment camps will be overseen by his ‘Personal Pastor’, Paula (whose last name is White…you can’t make this sh*t up).

     “But Daddy!” complains Ivanka, “I have my own children to raise!”

     “So, do I,” says Sarah, sullenly.

     “Me, too!” Kellyanne quips.

     “As do I.” Melania drones.

     “And I’m running a multi-million dollar scam organization!” yelps the ‘Pastor’. “Plus Kids!”

     Ivanka rolls her eyes. “We’re all running multi-million dollar scam organizations, plus kids!”

     “It’s the only way!” the Overlord booms. “It’s ‘The Lord's Way'!

     “L’Orange, you don’t actually believe in ‘Ze Lord’s Vay’!” his wife exclaims, hands on hips, frown on lips.

     “I do now! And women need to know their ‘place!’ Thanks to you ladies, we’re going to show the country, the good ‘ole US of A who’s in charge here! Now start packing! Your nannies can raise your children; if it was good enough for me, it’s good enough for them. God Bless America!”

     The women stare at each other in disbelief, not realizing until this moment that they have brought this on themselves, just like their menstrual cycles, instigated by Eve’s weakness in the Garden of Eden. After all, everyone knows that men are far superior, and Baby Jesus wants it this way.